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Checking in on 2024’s many primate pictures

by Sunburst Viral
2 years ago
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2024 had a lot of great movies of all stripes: Sci-fi! Action! Comedy! Animation! Thrillers! But there was one micro-genre that had a particularly noteworthy year: the primate picture.

At least five movies about primates or with a primate in the title made it to theaters in 2024, and quite honestly most of them were worth watching. So it is on us to document the year in primate pictures, and play everyone’s favorite game: How primatal is that picture?

Where to watch: For digital rental/purchase on Apple TV, Fandango at Home

Fred Hechinger in Gladiator II, with a monkey dressed as a baby perched on his shoulder

Image: Paramount Pictures

The picture: Ridley Scott’s belated sequel to one of his most well-known movies, Gladiator II brought a star-studded cast back to Rome with… mixed results.

The primate: Dundas. A pet of Emperor Caracalla (Fred Hechinger), Dundas is eventually named (spoiler alert) first counsel by Caracalla, making him an extraordinarily powerful politician in Rome.

How primatal is that picture? Not very. Dundas is a surprising minor thread Gladiator II pulls on, but not for long, and not in a major way. He also can’t compete with Gladiator II’s killer baboons. (According to Hechinger, Ridley Scott has a thing for monkeys.)

Where to watch: Prime Video

A man wearing a monkey mask looks at the camera in Monkey Man

Image: Universal Pictures

The picture: Dev Patel’s directorial debut is an interesting, if uneven, revenge thriller. But it hopefully launches the start of the taekwondo black belt’s action star career, as well as his career as a feature director.

The primate: There is no literal primate in this movie, but Patel’s character Kid wears a monkey mask while competing in an underground fighting ring.

How primatal is that picture? Also not very, but it ekes out Gladiator II by having the “monkey” be (a) the star and (b) in the title of the movie.

Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire

Where to watch: Netflix, Max

Kong bellows with his axe in a lava cavern of some kind in Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire

Image: Warner Bros. Pictures

The picture: The fifth movie in the Monsterverse franchise has Kong teaming up with Godzilla to fight fellow giant ape Skar King and the ice-breathing Titan Shimo.

The primate: Kong is on the marquee, and the big man delivers (this time with a giant mechanical contraption on his hand — all the better to punch with, my dears). But there are other primates: Antagonist Skar King is another giant ape, and Kong and the gang meet plenty of apes in the Hollow Earth.

How primatal is that picture? Very! The big guy has to share top billing with Godzilla (which is an honor for anyone, to be sure), but this is definitely the most primate-centric entry in the franchise yet.

Where to watch: In theaters

In Better Man, Alison Steadman holds the chin of a CG monkey Robbie Williams who is taking a bath, as they look in each other’s eyes

Image: Paramount Pictures

The picture: The Greatest Showman director Michael Gracey’s biopic of Robbie Williams depicts the British pop singer as a CGI monkey. According to Williams, that’s because they wanted the movie to stand out from the relatively stale genre of musician biopics, but it has some thematic resonance as well.

The primate: Robbie Williams. Williams is not a primate in real life, but the device makes for both an excellent technical showcase and a handy metaphor for the isolation and infantilization of being a pop star.

How primatal is that picture? Extremely. This movie has a primate on screen at almost all times, and looks damn good doing it. This was my personal favorite primate picture of the year.

Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes

Noa, a chimpanzee, rides a horse in front of a forest in the film Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes

Image: 20th Century Studios

The picture: The fourth movie in the consistently good Planet of the Apes reboot takes place many years after Apes have taken over Earth, and follows an unlikely partnership between a human girl and an ape.

The primate: Noa, the movie’s protagonist, is our lead primate. A chimpanzee and heir to his clan, he teams up with Freya Allan’s Mae to try and rescue his clan and take down the brutal bonobo leader Proximus Caesar.

How primatal is that picture? The most! You can’t get much more primatal than an entire kingdom of apes. And as has been the case with the entire reboot franchise, the apes look fantastic — the legendary Wētā FX, best known for its work on the Lord of the Rings and Avatar movies, worked on this movie as well as Godzilla x Kong and Better Man. They know primates.



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