Within the pages of Marvel Comics, there is a small army of heroes with amazing powers that they use to fight crime and protect the world. We will not be covering any of those characters today. Instead, we’ll take a tour of the lesser-known characters with powers that can be described as different, unique, or more bluntly, bad.
Sometimes, a terrible power doesn’t mean the character is bad, as their story can be about navigating life with an ability that feels more like a curse than a blessing. Ranging from one-shot characters that were better left forgotten to the beloved oddities roaming the Marvel Comics universe, these are the Marvel Comics “superheroes” with the worst powers.
10
ForgetMeNot
Makes people forget he ever existed
If you’re able to remember the X-Men ForgetMeNot, then his power is temporarily not working. A loyal member of the X-Men, ForgetMeNot has fought alongside the mutant team in some of the greatest Marvel Comics storylines, but his ability to be forgotten the moment he leaves someone’s line of sight leaves him as an unsung ally. This ability also makes him undetectable to modern technology such as radar systems, and he can slip by powerful psychics without being noticed.
There is a use to ForgetMeNot’s powers, but for the mutant himself, his abilities leave him isolated and depressed. One of the few to remember ForgetMeNot was Professor X, but that required the telepath to create a psychic reminder in order to stay in contact. Physical traces of ForgetMeNot’s presence could be noticed, such as when he used supplies, so while the X-Men could conceivably prove his existence, there would never be a memory of meeting him or his contributions.
9
Maggott
It’s about as bad as you suspect
When a character is named Maggott, there’s a certain level of expectation that goes along with it. The mutant hero doesn’t disappoint, boasting the ability to release slug-like cheaters from his abdomen that ingest anything within seconds. After chowing down, the slugs return to burrow back into Maggott, and he draws power from what they ate. More than an individual hero, Maggott is almost a self-contained super team when taking into account the many services his slugs provide.
Maggott’s level of strength and size is directly related to the amount of energy his slugs, named Eany and Meany, consume. More than just revolting food delivery vessels, Eany and Meany are also able to heal Maggott as needed, giving the mutant an edge in battle that all the other non-slug-owning characters don’t have. Maggott proves that there truly are endless variations of mutant powers that exist.
8
Skin
Can manipulate his loose skin
There are X-Men with the coolest mutant powers in the Marvel Universe, and then there are those with the weirdest. The X-Men character Skin poses this question by using his six feet of extra skin to aid him in helping mutants fight for equality. Real name Angelo Espinosa, Skin is able to manipulate his durable but loose grey skin into different shapes and can alter his face, limbs, and body into different sizes.
A founding member of Generation X, Skin is useful offensively by wrapping up his opponents in his skin, and he can also be an asset defensively by shielding his teammates with reinforced epidermis. The stretchy mutant was introduced as a student learning how to control his powers, and with effort, Skin can now maintain a physical form that resembles his fellow mutants. However, if he were to completely relax, he would more closely resemble a melting candle, which could always work to distract Magneto for a few seconds.
7
Human Top (David Mitchell)
He spins
While delivering flowers to a hospital, teen David Mitchell is taken hostage by the villain Agent Axis, and after receiving an electric surge of power while strapped to a surgical device, he becomes the Human Top. Now bestowed with the power to spin at superspeed, he became a member of the Kid Commandos, a group that fought Nazis in America.
When a bank is being robbed, or a plane is falling out of the sky, how many times has someone said, “I wish there were someone who could spin fast to save the day”? Probably never, but for all problems that require spinning, there is the Human Top, spinning around without ever getting dizzy. The power is so limited in scope that there’s not much of a way to apply it long-term, which is why this obscure character had limited appearances.
6
Fluff
Makes belly button lint on command
No one owns a V-neck outfit that goes as low as the one on Fluff. Of course, the hero needs his naval exposed, because that’s where he expels large amounts of belly button lint that he can alter the chemical composition of. Additionally, his coat of “bio fluff” provides a natural defense system that protects him from all manner of projectiles. At least, that’s what Fluff said, and it could have been a Fluff bluff considering how little is known about him.
Possibly as a means to compensate for having a ridiculous power, Fluff considers himself a ladies’ man, hitting on anyone around him regardless of the situation. It’s a power that seems silly, but depending on the control he has over the chemical composition, Fluff could be a dangerous character to face in battle (or a potentially funny MCU hero). There had to have been a few criminals who stopped and said, “Wait, is he shooting something out of his stomach,” and then were quickly wrapped in belly glue.
5
Gin Genie
Alcohol-powered vibrations
Most heroes would consider drinking before going into battle a bad idea (except for Wolverine, probably), but for Gin Genie, it was a necessity. Once inebriated, Gin Genie, real name Beckah Parker, could generate large-scale vibrations proportional to how much she drank. A night of heavy drinking for Gin Genie could result in an earthquake of a disastrous degree. For Beckah, the source of her power was also killing her, as she had developed a dependency on alcohol that was destroying her mind and body alike.
Gin Genie was a short-lived hero, literally, as a member of the revamped X-Force that reimagined the team as celebrity-obsessed superheroes that were as concerned with their merchandise sales as they were saving lives. By the time we are introduced to Gin Genie, she has become increasingly unstable, paranoid that her teammates were out to sabotage her. The X-Force was a highly dysfunctional group, and the inclusion and enablement of Gin Genie was a prime example of the team’s ethics.
4
Bailey Hoskins
Can explode exactly one time
In a crowded lineup of mutant characters, it takes having a particularly bad power to be known as ‘The Worst X-Man,’ but such is the case for Bailey Hoskins. Bailey has the unfortunate ability of self-detonation, but he does not have the power to heal from the explosion. Bailey will not have the opportunity to explode more than once, because he will be too dead to do it a second time.
For anyone who thinks they know who the weakest X-Men character is, Bailey lowers the bar. After learning what he could do from Hank “Beast” McCoy, even Bailey himself says his power is essentially like not having a superpower at all. The power to explode one time is less a superpower and more a very bad option. Like jumping into a wood chipper is an option, but it’s a bad one, and no one would wear a costume bragging about the ability to do it.
3
Soft Serve
Poops ice cream
To be fair, Soft Serve is a mutant who has never jumped into battle with Wolverine or Storm, but that’s only because they never had a need for her power, which was pooping ice cream. The power has never been fully illustrated on a double-page layout, but Soft Serve’s abilities extend to virtually any flavor of ice cream. Despite her flavor flexibility, no one should expect yogurt or gelato from the mutant.
Soft Serve only has two appearances in Marvel Comics, both in a minor capacity, but the reputation of what she does and where she does it makes her a name not to be forgotten. Amazingly, Soft Serve isn’t the only Marvel character with ice cream powers, as there is also a villain named Eye-Scream who can turn himself into any flavor of the dessert. The two haven’t faced off in the books, but we’ll probably get to see it on the big screen during the third reboot of the MCU.
2
Almighty Dollar
The ability to shoot pennies
Once upon a time, Marvel Comics partnered with the NFL to make a football-themed superhero known as SuperPro. A comic book starring the hero didn’t last long, but the peculiar footnote in the history of the publishing company also gifted us another obscure hero called the Almighty Dollar. After CPA J. Pennington Pennypacker is exposed to a machine that hands out awful superpowers, he gains the ability to shoot pennies.
Where exactly do the pennies come from? Does it hurt to shoot the pennies? Are they considered legal currency? None of these questions were answered because the Almighty Dollar, who doesn’t shoot dollars, only appeared in the one issue. He either retired while he was ahead or was immediately killed the first time he faced an entry-level supervillain who was impervious to pennies, which describes every villain, including ones who haven’t been created yet.
1
Hindsight Lad
The “power” of hindsight
By day, Carlton LaFroyge is an obnoxious teen with delusions of grandeur. As Hindsight Lad, he is still all of those things, but now wearing a costume. Possessing no actual superpowers, Carlton gives himself the power of hindsight as a member of the New Warriors. Wearing a costume that sags where the muscles would be, Hindsight Light offers his services to review what the New Warriors did and give them tips on how to improve.
The only way Carlton got his spot in the New Warriors was by learning that Speedball was his neighbor, Robbie Baldwin. Carlton then annoyed Robbie with requests to join the team, only to be told no because of the complete lack of powers. Undaunted, Carlton said he would reveal Robbie’s identity if he wasn’t allowed to join the team, and the rest was history. So really, Hindsight Lad’s power is blackmail, and that’s more useful than hindsight.
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