The Diddy trial is still unfolding, but Bill Maher believes it has already shown that a “new rule” should be imposed for sexual assault cases nearly eight years after the start of the #MeToo movement.
In his end-of-show monologue on Real Time Friday (watch it above), Maher used the prosecution of Sean “Diddy” Combs as a prism for how sexual misconduct is viewed in society and in the justice system. “A lot has changed” since the initial wave of allegations against Harvey Weinstein and many others in 2017, he maintained.
“We need to keep two thoughts in our head at the same time: One, Diddy is a bad dude – really bad. Like, the worst thing in rap since Hammer pants. A violent, sick f–k – I’m sorry, an alleged violent, sick f–k. And we should lock him up and throw away the baby oil,” Maher said. “And two, things have changed enough that moving forward, the rule should be, if you’re being abused, you’ve got to leave right away.”
The host pointed out what he sees as inconsistencies in the testimony of Cassie Ventura, Diddy’s former girlfriend.
“It’s not victim-shaming to expect women to have the agency to leave toxic relationships. Quite the contrary, to not expect that is infantilizing,” Maher said. “If Diddy walks free, it will because his lawyers can point to an endless stream of texts from Cassie expressing what’s often called ‘enthusiastic consent’ to their sex life. If you’re ‘MeToo-ing’ someone, it’s not helpful to your case if you texted him, ‘me too!’”
A graphic on the screen next to Maher displayed text messages from Ventura to Combs presented at trial, including one that read, “I’m always ready to freak off.”
Years ago, “when women felt, for good reason, that ‘OG predators’ like Bill Cosby and Harvey Weinstein would never be held accountable, why not at least get something out of it?” Maher said. Most of the initially accused perpetrators were surrounded by “all sorts of enablers” (assistants, cops, agents, “cowards” afraid to defy the person signing their paycheck), Maher recalled. In that era, “it was not illogical for an abused woman to say, ‘Well, if I can’t get justice for my pain, can I at least get a receipt? A coupon?’”
Maher did acknowledge, “as counter-intuitive as it seems, why an abused woman would send complimentary text.” Unlike in past eras, though, he argued, “We’re not in the ‘no one listens to women or takes them seriously’ era anymore. Operators are actually standing by to take your calls.”
Statistics show more women have reported claims of abuse and mistreatment over the past seven-plus years, Maher pointed out.
“I understand why it can be difficult for women to leave an abusive relationship,” he said. “But this should be society’s new grand bargain. We take every allegation seriously, but don’t tell me anymore about your contemporaneous account that you said to two friends 10 years ago. Tell the police right away. Don’t wait a decade. Don’t journal about it. Don’t turn it into a one-woman show. And most importantly, don’t keep f–king him. Your only contemporaneous notes about what he did should be a police report.”
The show-business sparkle of the music business also can’t be eliminated from the Diddy situation or others that have played out in Hollywood, Maher continued. “If we’re going to have an honest conversation about abuse, we also have to have an honest conversation about what people are willing to do for stardom. If you want a No. 1 record so bad you’ll take a No. 1 in the face, some of that is on you,” he said. “And if you’re doing it for love, well, c’mon, Oprah and Dr. Phil and every podcaster in the world by now have done a million shows about ‘abuse is not love’ and ‘abusers don’t change.’”
R&B singer Ike Turner “was a psycho, just like Diddy,” Maher said. “But in an era when there was no movement to help her, Tina Turner somehow got away and she did it with 36 cents in her pocket and a mobile card.”
