“Freedom pulsed throughout my whole being,” writes Parvati, recalling her first time wearing a “new, manly appendage.”
Parvati Shallow is sharing all the details of her life — including some bedroom stories — in her new book, Nice Girls Don’t Win: How I Burned It All Down to Claim My Power.
In the memoir, which was released on Tuesday July 8, the reality star opened up about her relationship with comedian Mae Martin.
“Mae’s a beautiful mix of boy and girl. Or neither, really,” Parvati explained in the book, per UsWeekly.
“They’re nonbinary, and they’d been with lots of straight women before. Only some of them ever want to wear the d–k,” Parvati wrote, referring to a strap-on.
“This was an exploration for both of us. I’d only ever been with men before, and Mae knew this. Both of us dove into a field of infinite creative possibility, playing in the void together: It was exciting, making it all up in the moment.”
Parvati went on to reveal how the “new, manly appendage” took away the pressure she “felt to perform.”
“Freedom pulsed throughout my whole being,” the excerpt continued. “My heart flew open. I climbed on top of Mae and I pressed my d–k into them, watching it go in and out. I gripped their short blond hair and pulled their head back toward the pillow, leaning down to kiss their mouth. I was actively, passionately present, wildly turned on inside this entirely new experience.”
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The couple went public with their relationship in December 2023, which was also a public coming out as queer for The Traitors alum and Survivor winner. In 2024, the two were awarded the Billie Eilish Award for LGBTQ+ Announcement at the Las Culturistas Culture Awards, a spinoff from Bowen Yang and Matt Rogers’ Las Culturistas podcast.
Prior to this relationship, Shallow as married to fellow Survivor alum John Fincher from 2017 to 2021, obtaining a domestic violence restraining order against him when they split. The former couple share a daughter, born July 2018.
She also dishes dirt on the reality television world, opening up about her time on Survivor and The Traitors.
“I didn’t write the book to look good,” the Survivor legend told Entertainment Weekly.
“A lot of the things I talk about in the book are sort of off-limits taboo topics like cancer, divorce, money, death, emotional affairs, and queer sex,” she continued. “There’s just a lot of stuff in there that I think maybe will make readers feel uncomfortable. And I did that on purpose. I really want it to be an embodied experience for people who are reading it to notice how they feel inside themselves as they read it.”
Nice Girls Don’t Win: How I Burned It All Down to Claim My Power is available now.