Former President Donald Trump’s running mate JD Vance is out campaigning to show he’s not a boring weirdo with zero charisma. It’s not going well.
Last week, Donald Trump announced he had selected Ohio senator JD Vance as his vice presidential nominee. Vance is famous for being terrible, but also for writing a best-selling memoir—Hillbilly Elegy—which was turned into a forgettable Netflix movie starring Amy Adams and Glenn Close. Oh, and he also once called Trump a “moral disaster,” and possibly “America’s Hitler.” And apparently, Trump now regrets picking the boring dude after the recent announcement that Joe Biden is stepping out of the 2024 race and Kamala is likely to replace him on the ticket.
Anyway, Vance is out on the campaign trail, attending rallies, and trying to convince people he’s a real normal dude who drinks one or even two(!) Diet Mountain Dews, despite those damn Democrats and liberals probably thinking that’s racist…or something.
During a rally on Monday in Middletown, Ohio, Vance said this:
“It is the weirdest thing to me. Democrats say that it is racist to believe… Well, they say it’s racist just to do anything.”
He then paused for a moment and the silence in the auditorium was hard to miss. Perhaps realizing that the line didn’t land, he continued and quickly added:
“I had a Diet Mountain Dew yesterday. And one today, I’m sure they’re going to call that racist too, but…”
He paused again, this time for longer. In the background, you can hear maybe two people laughing. Audience members visible behind Vance mostly didn’t react or just flashed a quick nervous smile. At this point, I’d recommend Vance abort and move on from this bit. But, instead, he dug his grave deeper.
“It’s good,” added Vance. This got a few more laughs, but mainly because at this point it seems the audience realized that, oh hey, this guy is trying to be funny. Vance then committed the biggest no-no during a joke: He laughed too hard at his own bad joke. And then, as if it sticking to a script where this line killed and the audience was laughing, Vance pointed out to the confused people and said: “I love you guys.”
What followed was a few seconds of one person clapping loudly and Vance laughing so much more. Meanwhile, somewhere in the world, I imagine Trump is wondering why he let his idiot sons convince him to pick this guy.
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