Hugh Jackman was on his way to school when his mother said goodbye – and something in her tone that day, with that particular word, stood out as unusual.
The future A-lister was eight when his mother, Grace, waved off her youngest son, her family and the adopted country of Australia for a life back in the UK.
Jackman was unaware his mother left him, his father, their family, that day. It would take him years to understand Grace’s decision and the sad reason behind it.
Here is a look back at the complex relationship Jackman had with his mum and how they made peace.
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“I can remember the morning she left, it’s weird the things you pick up,” the Wolverine star said in a 2012 interview with 60 Minutes.
“I remember her being in a towel around her head and saying goodbye, must have been the way she said goodbye as I went off to school.”
Jackman has spoken at length about this traumatic moment in his childhood, and how when he returned home from school that day, the house was quiet.
His mother wasn’t home and there wasn’t another soul in the house. It was only the next day, when the mail arrived, that a brutal truth was laid bare.
“There was a telegram from England, Mum was there. And then that was it,” he said.
“Dad used to pray every night that Mum would come back.”
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Jackson’s parents were both English and emigrated to Australia in the 1960s as part of the Ten Pound Pom scheme.
Christopher, an accountant, embraced the Australian way of life, though, by all accounts, Grace struggled. The distance from her family proved too great.
Despite her decision to return to England, Jackman said she never forgot her children.
“There was a telegram from England, Mum was there. And then that was it.”
“I saw her every year. She would come over. It would be like a family holiday,” The Greatest Showman star told the UK Telegraph in 2011.
“I remember going to the beach. There was a chance of a reconciliation at that point but she didn’t come back for good.”
Jackman said the distance was a difficult adjustment as was life at home.
After Grace left, Jackman’s father was left to provide for five children – three boys and two girls – on his own.
“I was volatile. My mum left when I was eight. My anger didn’t really surface until I was 12 or 13,” he told Parade in 2015.
“It was triggered because my parents were going to get reconciled and didn’t. All those years I’d been holding out hope that they would.”
As well as struggling with an inner anger, his mother’s abandonment fuelled fear.
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“From the moment Mum left, I was a fearful kid who felt powerless,” he said.
“I used to be the first one home and I was frightened to go inside. I couldn’t go into the house on my own. I’d wait outside, scared, frustrated.”
This fear transformed as he grew up. He became scared of the dark, of heights. It limited him and he responded with anger.
Jackman said at school is when the “perfect storm of hormones and emotions” came to the fore. He would harness his rage in sport and again in Hollywood, superhero form.
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“Playing rugby, my rage would come out, rage that I identify as ‘Wolverine rage’,” he said.
“I’d be somewhere in a ruck in rugby, get punched in the face and I’d just go into a white rage.”
Years later, Jackman’s sisters, Zoe and Sonya, moved to the UK to live with Grace.
“I know this might sound strange – I never felt that my mum didn’t love me.”
Jackman and his brothers, Ian and Ralph, remained with their father.
The notoriously private film and theatre star has since made peace with his mother.
“The thing I never felt – and I know this might sound strange – I never felt that my mum didn’t love me,” he told Us Weekly in 2017.
“I’ve spoken about it at length with her since and I know she was struggling. She was in hospital after I was born suffering from postnatal depression. There wasn’t a support network for her here.”
Data from the World Health Organisation (WHO) found about 10 per cent of pregnant women and 13 per cent of women who have just given birth suffer from a mental health condition, the main being depression.
Two years ago, in 2022, Jackman opened up about how therapy helped him with his childhood.
“I just started it recently. It’s helped me a lot,” he said.
“We all need a village. You need a friend you can unload everything – having someone really smart, who’s a little a bit removed from your world can be really helpful.”
He said therapy has allowed him to be more at peace.
“Understanding my past and how it’s informing my thinking unconsciously – getting to really understand some of the patterns that I was unconsciously just repeating,” he said.
“And, most importantly, helping me to be more relational with the people I love in my life, and really understanding and living in their shoes and being clear to be able to see them.”
Jackman, 55, continues to have a strong relationship with his mother.
Sadly, Christopher died in September 2021, on Father’s Day in Australia.
“In the early hours of Father’s Day (AU), my Dad peacefully passed away,” Jackman wrote in an online tribute.
“And whilst there is deep sadness, I am filled with such gratitude and love. My Dad was, in a word, extraordinary. He devoted his life to his family, his work and his faith. I pray he is now at peace with God.”
If you or anyone you know needs immediate support, contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 or via lifeline.org.au. In an emergency, call 000.
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